Twister (1996)

Directed by Jan de Bont. Starring Bill Paxton, Helen Hunt, Jami Gertz, Cary Elwes, Lois Smith, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Alan Ruck, Jeremy Davies, Sean Whalen, Zach Grenier, Wendle Josepher, Joey Slotnick. [PG-13]

Estranged couple Paxton and Hunt are on the verge of finalizing their divorce, but that act is delayed because they’re also tornado chasers who find themselves in a patch of Oklahoma that must have really ticked off the Almighty since it seems to get hit by approximately 230 tph (tornadoes per hour). Mindless excuse to trot out the latest advancements in eye-popping digital visual effects and eardrum-assaulting sound design; all pauses for flimsy characters and flimsier storytelling are painful enough to inspire jealousy for the poor “flying” cow in the picture’s best-remembered scene. The stars aren’t required to do much besides shout over the howling winds and hold tight; supporting players range from irksome (Hoffman’s chowderhead storm-chasing flunky) to intolerable (Gertz as Paxton’s prissy squawker of a girlfriend). Exemplifies truth in advertising: this thing sure does blow. Scripted by Michael Crichton with then-wife, Anne-Marie Martin; Steven Spielberg was one of the executive producers.

36/100