Blame It on Rio (1984)

Directed by Stanley Donen. Starring Michael Caine, Joseph Bologna, Michelle Johnson, Demi Moore, Valerie Harper, José Lewgoy. [R]

There’s plenty of blame to go around in this dreadful picture, and Rio is hardly a prime target (in fact, the lush backdrops are about the only thing in this film that’s not despicable on some level). Middle-aged best friends Caine and Bologna travel to the Brazilian hot spot for vacation, and bring along their nubile teenage daughters; in no time at all, Bologna’s kid (Johnson) hooks up with Caine, turns obsessive, disturbed, and even suicidal, but, hey, we’re supposed to laugh. Written like a bad sitcom in the trappings of a sniggering sex farce, interrupted by intermittent talking head confessionals from Caine, bogged down by relentlessly sleazy unpleasantness (as if statutory crimes weren’t enough, Johnson calls Caine “Uncle Matthew,” which also adds the suggestion of incest). Not a single laugh throughout, unless the pitiful attempts to mine morsels of “truth” out of these situations count. Photographed by your creepy uncle, though credit went to Reynaldo Villalobos. Based on French film Un Moment d’Égarement (In a Wild Moment). Director Donen’s final feature film.

7/100