Grease 2 (1982)

Directed by Patricia Birch. Starring Michelle Pfeiffer, Maxwell Caulfield, Adrian Zmed, Maureen Teefy, Pamela Segall, Peter Frechette, Christopher McDonald, Didi Conn, Lorna Luft, Eve Arden, Connie Stevens, Leif Green, Alison Price, Tab Hunter, Dody Goodman, Sid Caesar. [PG]

Irrelevant sequel to the hit musical is a total drag; to employ a pun bad enough to give you an idea of its unsavory qualities, greased lightnin’ doesn’t strike twice. The thin yet tortured script barely bothers with a plot, and is basically a hasty gender-reversal rewrite of the romantic complications from the original. Aussie preppie Caulfield (noted as being from England because that’s just how dumb the writing is) pines for Pink Lady Pfeiffer, but she can only date a T-Bird greaser, so he transforms himself into a mysterious biker known as the “Cool Rider.” The leads are bland, the supporting cast unappealing, the characters too often lack continuity and logic (why the heck are the greasers trying out for the talent competition??), the choreography is flat despite director Birch’s background, and the endless string of musical numbers wavers between tiresome and fatuous. Once again provides an unhealthy message supporting conformity and hooliganism, but considering the film’s witless excess and inexcusable length, it’s doubtful that anyone would still be paying attention by that point anyway.

22/100