Pieces (1982)

Directed by Juan Piquer Simón. Starring Christopher George, Ian Sera, Linda Day, Frank Braña, Paul L. Smith, Edmund Purdom, Isabelle Luque, Leticia Marfil, Gérard Tichy.

Part slasher; part splatter; all, um, splasher? Wait, that’s not what I meant. Trash—all trash, that’s what it is. Which isn’t to say that trash can’t have entertainment value (sometimes it does to a high degree), but what’s to be made of this? Curiously obsessed by a “dirty” jigsaw puzzle, a little kid gets away with murder after dismembering his mom; many years later, the same maniac is chopping off body parts of young college coed victims and using the pieces to create a lady of his own (some assembly required). Very bloody, but the murder set pieces only demonstrate intermittent style and/or skill, and the scenes in between vary between the risible and the tedious. The outlandish gore isn’t the only thing you’ll remember, but unless you love accidental camp in the form of the random appearance of a kung fu professor, the most pathetic tennis lessons you can imagine, an obnoxious (and obnoxiously loud) score, and more, it’s the only reason to bother watching. Final “shock” doesn’t make a lick of sense, so…fitting.

38/100