White House Down (2013)

Directed by Roland Emmerich. Starring Channing Tatum, Jamie Foxx, Maggie Gyllenhaal, James Woods, Richard Jenkins, Joey King, Jason Clarke, Jimmi Simpson, Lance Reddick, Nicolas Wright, Kevin Rankin, Michael Murphy, Matt Craven, Rachelle Lefevre, Jackie Geary. [PG-13]

Idiotic “Die Hard in the White House” pits USCP officer (and wannabe Secret Service agent) Tatum against a crew of terrorists who attack the resident president (Foxx) in order to carry out a convoluted and absurd plan to…well, it’s unlikely that even they know what they’re doing. Not quite as bleak as the other movie from 2013 to show an assault on the White House (Olympus Has Fallen), but even more far-fetched and tonally erratic, with plot holes big enough to fly Air Force One through. Tatum doesn’t make for an especially memorable lone-hero-against-impossible-odds; Foxx is a blatant stand-in for then-sitting President Obama (chews Nicorette, plays basketball, etc.), making all of the peril and glib wisecracks rather unsavory. Director Emmerich cant be faulted for his commitment to throwing in everything but the kitchen sink, but the pile-up of “oh, come on”s wears thin fast; plus, the action scenes are often choppy to the point of incoherence and the special effects are quite awful considering the large budget (the green-screen work in particular is direct-to-video level—no one will be stunned to learn it was filmed in Canada instead of on location). At least the movie jumps so quickly into the realm of fantasy that none of its clumsy swipes into the international politics arena can be taken seriously.

34/100