Cloverfield (2008)

Directed by Matt Reeves. Starring Michael Stahl-David, Jessica Lucas, Lizzy Caplan, T. J. Miller, Odette Yustman, Mike Vogel. [PG-13]

Headache-inducing found footage-style monster movie set in NYC during a high-rise apartment party, which gets interrupted when a massive creature lands off the coast of Manhattan and wreaks cataclysmic havoc. Let’s get the obvious issue out of the way—the POV camera gimmick, maintained throughout all the chaotic running and jumping and scrapping, is so galling in its illogic, the phony illusion inspired numerous parodies (“South Park”, et al)—and just pretend it was a conceptual choice made by the filmmakers to create a “unique” way to document a post-9/11 natural disaster/alien attack scenario. Now, let’s reroute the criticism to the old familiar: phony handheld amateur footage is just as unappealing to the eyes as the authentic variety. Add onto that a small group of pretty but self-absorbed potential-victims to vaguely follow through the pandemonium so that rooting interest and emotional stakes are as bare as Mother Hubbard’s cupboard, and you’re left with empty spectacle from an inverted and insular perspective. Since character development is shallower than a kiddie pool, the first twenty minutes are wasted time, and the next sixty or so are spent straining to make out something in the shaky frame worth looking at while trying to drown out the noisy chatter and shouting. The meager rewards aren’t worth the effort, which shouldn’t need to be said, yet the movie has its share of fervent fans; enough, in fact, to have inspired a couple of spiritual sequels in the so-called “Cloververse” (10 Cloverfield Lane and The Cloverfield Paradox). Co-produced by J. J. Abrams.

35/100