Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1953)

Directed by Howard Hawks. Starring Marilyn Monroe, Jane Russell, Elliott Reid, Tommy Noonan, Charles Coburn, Norma Varden, Taylor Holmes, George Winslow.

Trivial trifle can be bright and bubbly when it’s not boring (which is often). “Plot” deals with a couple of showgirls played by Monroe and Russell on the hunt for men—and in the case of gold-digger Monroe, sparkly diamonds, too—but all they find are wrong ones and wronger ones. The occasional amusing line (“Then why are you wearing that hat?”) can’t compete with a relentless aura of artificiality and avarice, or the clumsy farcical complications that are neither clever nor suspenseful, or that ludicrous doozy of a courtroom climax. Monroe’s dumb blonde routine is even more insipid than usual here, but she still finds a way to share a scene with someone she can act circles around (a precocious kid that helps her escape from a ship porthole). Hawks is hardly a pro with musical performances, and Jack Cole’s choreography is disposable; the “Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend” number may be semi-iconic, but the song is for the birds, and the others usually aren’t any better, suffering from forgettable melodies and inane lyrics (“I like big muscles and red corpuscles!”). The stage musical that inspired this film was based on a book from the 1920s, and time has not softened the creakiness of its values in a contemporary age. Followed (sorta) by Gentlemen Marry Brunettes.

41/100