Assassin’s Creed (2018)

Directed by Justin Kurzel. Starring Michael Fassbender, Marion Cotillard, Jeremy Irons, Charlotte Rampling, Brendan Gleeson, Denis Ménochet, Ariane Labed, Michael K. Williams, Khalid Abdalla, Javier Álvarez, Hovik Keuchkerian. [PG-13]

Fassbender plays a member of a sect known as the Assassins Brotherhood, operating during the Spanish Inquisition; he also plays a modern day descendant of that man, recruited by the enigmatic Abstergo Foundation so that they can use his “genetic memories” and discover what the assassin did with a valuable artifact centuries ago. Feature film adaptation of the popular video game series jumps back and forth between these precariously tethered timelines, but doesn’t have a plot progression worth describing or a character worth caring about; considering the solemn mood that hangs over everything like a shroud, that makes for one long and uninvolving slog. The fights and chases in the 15th century Spain scenes might have been exciting to watch if the shots hadn’t been hacked and slashed to incoherence in the editing room, or if the picture wasn’t always such a grungy blur (must hold some sort of record for most dust clouds seen in a single movie—apparently, the past was really hurting for Swiffer technology). Though they also suffer from a weak balance between the historical exploits and the modern tech angle, the games are much more engaging.

29/100